Wireless Mayhem

I have to admit it: I am not the most technologically savvy person in the world. In no way was this more clearly established than in my understanding of wireless devices.

From the outset, I had some problems with the mere concept. I mean here we are on this little rock in the solar system and we feel the need to send signals up to outer space to a satellite and beam back down a seres of colons and semicolons to indicate a smile to someone standing right next to us.

Though that seems odd, I ran into someone using something called a Bluetooth (the name itself is hinting that someone with a Bluetooth did something unspeakable to a Smurf and should probably be tested for a Smurferial disease) and he seemed to be a babbling idiot as he was speaking to apparently no one in particular. Of course I later found out he was speaking to someone with his Bluetooth. Boy was my face red after the representatives from the psychiatric ward explained it to me as they were loading the gentleman into the padded truck.

And at what point did everyone become farmers. My God, the population of this FarmVille place must be huge, and they all need something from me. But thankfully I will soon be able to help them…I am working on a business deal with a nice Nigerian fellow who is having some complications in collecting his inheritance. With my percentage of the profit I will be able to help those refugees out in this FarmVille place.

Maybe I will buy a Bluetooth, too. I’ve been trying to hide my status as a babbling idiot, so now I can use it as the perfect cover.

Until next time, my fellow Birubegjans.

Published by Alan Reese

Greetings blog wanderers and seekers of truth, or whatever truth appears to be from the mind of a warped individual. You have reached the inner sanctum of some guy named Alan. Having graduated college sometime shortly after the Earth cooled, he finds himself in his late 30's and working out in the real world. His humor is dry and his outlook not so serious and somehow has picked up the nasty habit of writing about himself in the third person. He is married with child and loves his family, sports and, of course, his beloved video games...likelihood of his growing up? Not good. Are you an established site or magazine looking for a writer? Drop me a line if you are interested.

2 thoughts on “Wireless Mayhem

  1. I’ve always theorized that all wireless devices are controlled by some sort of alliance of benevolent wizards that no one knows about. Actually I’ve postulated that when people go to school for some crazy thing like electrical engineering that they are actually going to wizard school to learn how to make cell phones work…or make the internet work…or what have you.


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